Wedding Favors
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Mistaking Hunger
   
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Preparing For Your Wedding Part I
Congratulations and best wishes on your upcoming wedding. You
are probably busy with preparation for the most important day of
the .....
Congratulations and best wishes on your upcoming wedding. You
are probably busy with preparation for the most important day of
the .....
You are not hungry most of the time. You are not always hungry
when something smells good, looks good, or tastes good, whether
or not you think you are. All food is prepared to tempt your
taste buds, even though youre not hungry. You are also not
hungry because there is stress, a deadline, pressure, a personal
or business problem, anxiety, tension, its morning afternoon
evening when alone with friends weekdays weekends day time night
time money problems it rained it didnt came with the dinner it
was there . . . You are not hungry 24 hours a day, though you
might think you are. There are many daily food encounters:
friends offering food, a maitre d describing dessert, the smell
of popcorn in a movie theater, to name but a few. Acknowledging
the visual and emotional blitz helps interrupt the knee-jerk
reaction that causes you to eat even though youre not hungry.
Just knowing you are not hungry most of the time is a helpful
piece of information. You may even have pinpointed the reasons
youre thinking of food, reasons that seem to justify your
eating when youre not hungry. Ive heard excuses as varied as
I got so angry because I couldnt get a cab to I got caught
in a downpour without an umbrella. Many of these reasons might
How To Choose Best Gifts For Your Special Friends
You started to get headache when you are invited to party. Not because you are not please, but there often problem when you have to choose the best gift for their occasion. Those who held a party .....
seem a valid enough reason to make you eat. They are not.You started to get headache when you are invited to party. Not because you are not please, but there often problem when you have to choose the best gift for their occasion. Those who held a party .....
Certainly anger might tempt you to use food as a drug to keep
the feelings down. If you eat when youre angry, does the anger
go away? Or perhaps frustration weakens your resolve. At which
point is your threshold for discomfort seriously challenged?
Bored? At exactly which point does a yawn become a yen? Tired?
When does food become a replacement for sleep? Does the
emotional pain diminish when you eat? Is the celebration any
better because you come home stuffed, bloated, and full of gas,
uncomfortable and with lowered self-esteem? Is it worth it?
Consider, if you will, that your past behavior has not worked. A
clear vision of what youre trying to accomplish will. Most of
all, you need a mind open to the possibility of change. One man
I almost taught was so afraid to change that he was locked into
where he hung his coat, where I sat, and where he sat. He was
terrified I was going to pull off his covers and yank away his
security blanket of whatever food he was holding onto
whichever food he thought made him comfortable. He was so
uncomfortable with even the thought of change, he would not tell
me how much he weighed, or what he wanted to weigh.
Of course its possible that some discomfort might occur while
youre changing. The very act of weighing less than you did
before is a change. And there is no change without change. But
there are ways to lessen the discomfort of the journey from
where you are to where you want to be; to offer options,
suggestions, tactics, tips, tried and true assignments that work
more and more as they are practiced. After all, you learned to
use food to calm yourself down. You can learn a new method, a
new automatic response.
Do you eat out of habit, not hunger? Identifying habits requires
guidance, introspection, and patience, but most of all honesty.
Once you acknowledge, Yes, I do that, you can decide you dont
want to do that anymore and begin to do something else, instead.
It is unrealistic and self-defeating to expect to go from
habitual, compulsive, or addictive eating behavior to a calm,
rational, in-control eating person by reading an article, even
this article. You can, however, alter automatic, learned
responses by creating new and effective alternative behaviors
that will result in permanent change. The new behavioral choices
add up to a permanent weight loss, incrementally, not
rattattattat. Its worth repeating: Your original patterns
evolved over a lifetime. Now you can consciously plan the person
you want to be. Food does not contain a narcotic. Food only has
the power you gave it by doing the same thing with it each time
you encountered it. Food has the power you vested in it as part
of a ritual distraction with your mind, many times since
childhood, when you might have learned how to cope with
stressful situations by using food inappropriately. It might
have worked then, but its not working now. Now you need to find
a new way that will work now. Ill show you what to do if you
are not hungry but are tempted. There are many things you can do
when food is offered, baked, cooked, prepared, and present just
for you. Learn how to handle the compelling urges at the office,
Invitation Anatomy 101 - Optional Components - Part 2 Of 3
Hopefully, youve read my prerequisite lesson Invitation Anatomy 101 Typical Components. If not, I would highly recommend reviewing that article first. Now that youve .....
in a restaurant, or at home. Learn that an umbrella-toppedHopefully, youve read my prerequisite lesson Invitation Anatomy 101 Typical Components. If not, I would highly recommend reviewing that article first. Now that youve .....
pushcart, wafting a familiar aroma, doesnt always mean you have
to eat a hot dog. Hunger demands to be fed. An urge passes. Know
the difference? The next time youre at home and thinking of
food, and you just ate a little while before, set a kitchen
timer for 20 minutes and distract yourself with some activity.
Sometimes I set the timer, get busy with some other project, and
when the bell goes off, I not only forget I set the bell, Im
not even sure why I set it in the first place. One woman
recalled a walk she took one summer day. She spied a man eating
an ice cream cone, (a visual stimulus). She used the mental
repatterning techniques shed created to distract herself. Shed
practiced and repeated the words, Alert. Alert. Cross the
street, which she did while laughing. She reassured herself
that everything was going to be okay, and she prompted herself
to calm her breathing.Two minutes later, Id found the most
adorable sequined hat in a store window, she recounted. The
moment clearly had passed. The techniques were there in her
memory bank because she had written the specifics of her plan,
reviewed it daily to remind herself of the details, envisioned
it in her mind, so that when the ice cream cone appeared, her
new automatic response to say, Alert. Alert. Cross the street,
take a deep breath, and keep walking, kicked in. It is a
process everyone can learn. It begins in your mind. If you do
not eat something when you normally would have, you might be
particularly motivated to reach your goal weight for an upcoming
wedding, class reunion, or birthday celebration. If you use will
power, self-control, good intentions, and inner resolve, youll
find the results temporary. The next time the same circumstances
or food appear, you may be a little less motivated or a little
more angry, lonely, tired, or bored, and youll probably eat the
food, only to reinforce your old eating behavior, which is what
caused you to gain weight in the first place. There is no good
intention, self-control, inner resolve or will power sharp
enough to cut through the layers and tentacles of your very
practiced and polished ritualized eating habits habits gone
haywire. If you ever had good intention, self-control, will
power or inner resolve, you would have used it 5, 10, 20, 30, or
50 pounds ago. If, however, you begin to change your
overreaction to food by doing something else, you might end up
eating the object of your desire, but, youll most likely not
put as much on your plate, youll eat a little less, stop a
little sooner, and eat it a little less intensely than if you
had not attempted some repatterning techniques. The first time
you do it the new way, it might feel awkward and uncomfortable.
It is different from what youve done in the past. But no matter
how uncomfortable you feel at the beginning of creating a new
habit, nothing is as uncomfortable as having to choose what to
wear based on how much of your body it will cover. Nothing is as
uncomfortable as selecting what to wear based on what fits on a
particular day rather than what is appropriate for a particular
occasion. Maintain a positive, I can do it mental attitude, and
positive results happen. Avoid negative words about yourself,
such as bad or failure or I blew it. They are just words and do
not apply to anyone who continues to try. It aint over until
its over, Yogi Berra said. I believe that. For best results,
attempt many kinds of change in your life. If drinking water
doesnt help by itself, perhaps the water and deep breathing
will be helpful. Sometimes water, deep breathing, changing
location and calling a friend is what you need. It is the action
of taking an action any action that gets the result. It
almost doesnt matter which techniques you use to repattern
what is important is that you take a swift, purposeful, and
immediate action. The quicker the action, the quicker the moment
of anxiety passes. It is possible that sometimes you might try
every technique available and the moment is still difficult. It
happens. But that doesnt mean you should stop trying. It just
means your results have not quite accumulated enough to effect a
noticeable change. It doesnt mean nothing is happening. It just
might be too subtle for you to notice. Keep doing it anyway. It
accumulates. Continue trying, and from each seemingly failed,
imperfect human attempt, the structure of the old, destructive
habit will be eroded another little bit . . . you will be that
much closer to success which is eating only when hungry. It took
many episodes of reinforcing old behavior to create patterns as
ingrained as the ones you are trying to change. It takes many
steps of new behavior until youre hooked on the new way.
Sometimes one technique works, sometimes another. Every food
encounter is different from every other one. Everyone responds
to each stimulus differently and responds to repatterning
techniques in a different way, too. A combination of several
techniques may be just the ticket when one is not enough. Be
creative. Identify your eating patterns. Even the seemingly
insignificant ones, such as its only broccoli, or I only drink
black coffee add up. Do you mean an orange has the same
significance as a piece of candy? What ritual thinking is in
your subconscious? Are leftovers a problem? Does food
preparation end up being one for you and one for the pot? Does
someone else serve you your food at home, in the office, in a
restaurant? Do you finish everything served to you? One woman I
teach had the habit of eating after eating. She battled that
habit for many months. When I spoke to her last week, however,
she reported a two-week period when she did not once eat after
dinner. This lifelong pattern had finally been laid to rest. She
is 59 years old. If you buy, prepare, serve, and accept a little
less food, youll eat less. Ultimately, youll be a little less.
If you dont bring it into the house you wont eat it. Out of
sight, out of mind. If it doesnt taste good or look good or
satisfy the eye and palate, dont eat it. We all belong to a
nation of people who finish everything on their plate. That is
not necessary. You may leave food over. Its okay. Food is
wasted if you put it into a body that doesnt need it. Better to
throw it away. If you order less the next time, there will be
less to waste. When you go off your program because youre
human, you didnt blow it, werent bad, or a failure. Dont beat
yourself up. Simply get back on your program at the very next
meal. Try to figure out what you could do next time the same
thing inevitably happens. The quicker youre back on your
program, the more youll want to stay on your program. It is
becoming comfortable, enjoyable, and preferred behavior. Think
of things you can do if youre thinking about eating but know
youre not hungry.
About the author:
Caryl Ehrlich, the author, also teaches The Caryl Ehrlich
Program, a one-on-one behavioral approach to weight loss in New
York City. Visit her at http://www.ConquerFood.com to know more
about weight loss and keep it off without diet, deprivation,
props, or pills. Caryl welcomes questions or comments about this
article and the behavioral methods she incorporates into her
weight loss program. Contact her at Caryl@ConquerFood.com